Christmas is only 39 days away. I know, that seems like alot -- but it's not.
I have always loved Christmas -- from the time I was little all the way into adulthood -- both for spiritual and sentimental reasons. I am so moved by the knowledge that God became flesh and took on all the vulnerability of man. I also really like all things Christmas, and the older (translate: the cheesier), the better.
Today I was showing some people at work a pair of new (old) Paramount electric candles I'd just gotten and one of the Pastors (the youngest one, by the way) walked by and said "cheesy". Yes, they're cheese, but they're great!!
I have boxes and boxes of old 30s, 40s & 50s decorations and always put up 2 trees, though I actually have 4. I usually start decorating on Thanksgiving weekend (it takes a few days) and used to even start my baking in October.
All that is leading up to this: I'm not looking forward to Christmas this year. For the first time I can ever remember, I barely feel like decorating, baking or even (gasp!) listening to a Christmas carol. I don't even care about hearing the King's College Choir "A Festival of Nine Lessons and Carols" -- and it's never Christmas season until I hear "Once in Royal David's City"!
This year, my extended family won't all be together at the holidays, even once, for the first time ever. Also, Charlie's moving to Florida a week before Christmas and we'll officially become empty-nesters. Danny's already told us he doubts that he'll come back home this summer. Jim is vague about his Christmas plans, but sounds like he might not be with us on Christmas Eve (a first) and that translates to probably not Christmas morning. It also sounds like he'll be leaving Michigan at about the time the Ohio family gets here. They're coming up, as usual, but in smaller numbers and only staying 2 days. We haven't had a "normal" Columbus family Christmas in a few years, either -- due to freak ice storms and family illness. I feel like this is a watershed year and the holidays (and life) will look different from now on.
Anyway, I'm not looking forward to any of it with enthusiasm. I'm hopeful that as the holidays get closer I will become more excited. I'll probably do all the things and bake the cookies and send the cards, but I have to admit, my heart's not in it. I'm cheerful, aren't I?
Thoughts, anyone? I'd love to hear them. . .